Reflections

Its Friday January 11th and I am hoping that by the end of this month I will be completely out of debt and my life will finally be back on track. Things have been nothing but stressful yet I have been able to man the storm that I have encountered in the short amount of time that I have been given. Honestly, there are days when I feel like giving into the temptation of the negatives in my life but by the time I get to the end of the thought I realize that if I do give in, there will be no room for change. No room for change means, no room to grow and no room to grow means no room for greatness. If I cannot reach the level of greatness that I would like to achieve then whats the point of even getting up and gong about my daily life. There isn't.

This week has been up and down just like any other week but the best thing about it is that I regained the friendship of many people that I assumed were no longer interested in my friendship. People that meant the world to me in previous times but have for some strange reason faded out of my life, almost completely. I guess it happens to the best of us because I have watched several people loose great friends and not for any particular reason other than the fact that they have slowly started to fade from one another due to life. Friends like these are friends that you should hold on to for the long haul because it is these friends who will have your back no matter what.

Despite the fact that I have had so many trials and tribulations I am feeling confident that things will get better. As of lately, I have both the love of my life and my closest friend to thank for that because without these people reminding me everyday of how great I am, I would probably be sitting pon my mothers couch watching some lame talk show, pissed off because I don't have anything going for me. Instead, I have these friends who are letting me know that I am already great and so long as I continue to do the things that I am doing. With this kind of love and support, I will most definately surpass the level of greatness that I always drempt of reaching.

Anyway, life will continue to build hills and valleys for me to cross but I will always know that in the end, it takes hard work to actually get what you want out of life. No matter how hard it gets I will always have that feeling of supported greatness to fall back on.

Where to Start

Where do I start today? Well, waking up in the condition that I did this morning is making this day feel longer than it should. I want to lay down but the day will not allow it. Am I coming down with something or am I simply not in a good mood and don't know why. As I lay in my bed trying to answer the math problems that my alarm sets to make sure that I am completely awake before I hit the snooze button, I could feel a wave of something not negative but it sure as hell wasn't positive either. Thinking about it now the only good thing about today is the fact that it is Friday and I am that much closer to getting the baddest bitch on the planet tatted on my back.

Night Terrors

It never dawned on me how much you could truly love someone until your not with them. Waking up in a cold sweat wishing that the empty spot next to you was filled with their being. Praying that the next time you meet face to face, it last for an eternity and beyond because the thought of losing them makes you sick to your stomach no matter how hard you try to deny the feeling. That moment of reality that takes place of fear and you finally realize that this is the person that makes you smile from the inside out. The person that has been there through the good, the bad, and the worst. The person who no matter what happens always embraces you with open arms and whispers in your ear those very words that mean nothing coming from someone else, "your gonna be okay."

It never dawned on me how much time we spent until we didn't spend time anymore and now I'm sitting here thinking about nothing more than fading into your chest until our heart beats become one. Synchronized to the rhythm of love.

Rining in the New Year

Well, This year started out so much better than I thought that it would. I guess its because I decided to really start fresh. I brought in the year with the people closest to me and that right there lets me know that 2013 is gonna be righteous. By righteous I mean that all things great are going to happen. From a year full of deadly downfalls to a year full of blessed uprisings.

We slept together and not only did we sleep but we connected on a level that I could feel even as I dreamt of the greatness 2013 has to offer us. I could feel the warmth of her blood rushing to the surface of her skin when I held her. I could hear the sound of her shallow breaths as she lay in a deep slumber, recovering from a well deserved New Years Eve get together with the family. I could even see the calm after the storm as she began to reach for me in her sleep not noticing the force in which she holds me. This connection seems to grow stronger the closer we get to realizing that we are great together.

As the sun rose in the sky this morning and we held one another close, I fell asleep in the arms of the woman that I love. The soft sounds of "Fade into You" by Scarlett O'Connor and Gunnar Scott from the new hit ABC television show Nashville, plays in the background as if we were filming our own movie and upon waking up for work, I was graced with the sweet vision of my chocolate fix.

If you ask me, there is was no better way to ring in the New Year than the way that I did this year. I got chocolate wasted with my chocolates and my light skins, was greeted with an unexpected welcome from a genuinely good man at heart and have gained a great friendship with yet another Capricorn. Hello 2013!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!

#2013  #TeamNattyNef  #TeamCapricorn  #TeamChocolate